10 Ways Your 20s Are Just Like Your High School Years

All of these Buzzfeed articles got me thinking about my 20s, what I like about them and what I actually miss about college. Then it dawned on me, my likes and dislikes all sounded vaguely familiar...enjoy.

1. You're on a (air quotes) "budget." Money is actually decent, and you find yourself sitting comfortably in between Ramen Noodles and Grey Goose, but leaning more towards Grey Goose when you can swing it. Thanks mom and dad for funding Emerging Adulthood.

2. You have to juggle family time and friends time.
"It's Saturday morning mom, I got in at 3 a.m. and NO I don't want to go to Ikea with you! What? You'll buy me new furniture? Okay where's the Advil..."


3. Suggesting movie/fro yo/random sober activity nights doesn't make you lame. No explanation needed, we've all been there. It's become socially acceptable again to hit up your friend for his parent's media room like, every other weekend.


4. Organized sports are cool again. Kickball anyone? Or softball might be more your style.


5. People actually go on dates.
Remember Starbucks hang outs in high school? Well now they're called coffee dates, and yes - they are real.


6. Your friends live more than 5 miles away.
16 year old self: What? You don't want to hang out because your parents have the car? 24 year old self: What you don't want to hang out because of gas prices and the long drive? Not so different.


7. You're well on your way to changing the world.
Whether or not it was to get into college or to become the next 30 Under 30, we know your motives.


8. You can be anonymous at the gym and choose to workout at a different place than your last hookup. I know, shocking. You still need to don Lululemon of course, don't get crazy.


9. You actually go to family events now.College is no longer the safe excuse it once was. And no you cannot hit on the hot 13 year olds at your cousin's Bar Mitzvah.

10. You have to plan your evening activities.AKA no 10pm Saturday night frat party texts, no Greek Life mixers and no group projects to do. And it's harder than it sounds. Movie night, anyone?

Brewed for Success

It’s a Sunday afternoon and everyone has on their spring Sunday best. Let’s face it; no one turns it on for a Broadway show better than the ladies and gentlemen of Dallas. And the return of the Dallas Summer Musical’s Wicked proved to be no different. Some would call it a creative spinoff, but the ultimate test of time has shown us that Wicked now stands in a league of its own. A beloved and Tony Award-winning musical, Wicked reveals the untold truth behind the life and upbringing of the Wizard of Oz’s Wicked Witch of the West, loveably named Elfaba, or Elfie for short.

As the show’s protagonist, Elfaba captures our hearts early on. The sad and often overused tale of a girl who was born different but yearns to be accepted feels fresh and invigorating with each monologue and powerhouse song. In short, the girl can bring down a house.

Though no one has bigger shoes to fill than an actress who follows in Idina Menzel’s footsteps, I was truly impressed by the talent and gumption I saw on stage yesterday. Wicked is one of the highest energy shows I know of, and each ballad comes in with higher expectations than the previous. We’ve all grown to love Wicked, what with its popularity on the hit show Glee, and the recognizable “Defying Gravity” – it’s just one show that doesn’t lend to 90 percent effort.

I have to say though, my heart goes out to any actress in the future who ever, and I repeat ever, has to follow Kristin Chenowith. She is a living, breathing, triple threat energizer bunny who can belt out elusive high notes in her sleep. It’s almost inhuman that she had a go at Glenda first, because I’m still searching for the actress who can revitalize the role of Oz’s Good Witch. The actress yesterday just felt a little, well, flat to me. It was like watching the show in 2D while secretly jealous of your friends who got tickets to the 3D IMAX version. You want to like and appreciate the movie, but you know it could be so much more.

Outside of the two main talents, everyone else pretty much held their own on stage. None of the other performers seemed like standout stars to me, but they did their jobs to charm and entertain the crowd – who unsurprisingly flew out of their seats at curtain close. A standing ovation was what they deserved, and in true Southern Hospitality form, it is exactly what we gave them. You never let me down, D-town.

The Art of The Sit-In

For as long as I can remember, the sit-in was a bad, bad, thing. From lonely time-out corners full of tears to stories of protesters invading a space to let their voices be heard, our society has been conditioned to believe that purposeful sitting must mean something is very wrong. If you don't believe me (and on the off chance you're in a Starbucks), take a look around. We've become a nation of over-caffeinated iPhone/Twitter/Facebook addicts that just can't seem to relax.

My penchant for analyzing the world around me has truly led me to this theory. We're afraid to sit still. No really, there is a legitimate fear that if we sat down, by ourselves, with no technology, the world would truly collapse. I'm not saying that I'm above it, of course. I am as plagued by this constant need to be active as the next person, but I wonder what would happen if I started to take a few minutes out of my day to just simply...be. And I'm not talking meditation style where you must "empty your mind" - because the 90% of us ADHDers know that ain't happening any time soon. But really, if you're in your 20s and you can't remember the last time you did something without your phone in your palm, look at this as a wake up call: I challenge you to sit with no motives.

"The monotony and solitude of a quiet life stimulates the creative mind." - Albert Einstein.

I'll leave you with this quote. If it seems just out of your reach to quiet your mind, know that the creativity within never dies. How's that for the ultimate multitask?

Happy Week Ahead,
Stephanie

Mea Culpa

I'd like to think that we live our lives within a series of Sliding Doors. There are countless paths we choose to take each day, each month and each year. Especially, each year. Universities, careers and relationships chosen are a culmination of the forks in the road that we follow down the path of life. How often do you look back though, and think "my mistake." How many times does that fleeting moment of regret hit you each day? For some of us, the feeling of dread and regret follows us like a shadow. The other, more fortunate set, make their choices and go with it without looking back. Oh do I wish I had what they had.

I pose to you today though, don't fall victim to the constant agitation of always looking back and what could have happened. The phrase mea culpa, which literally translates to my mistake, or my fault, rears its ugly head in far too many 20 year old young adults. It's just a nuisance. If you feel like there is something you should have done, then do it today, but if the moment has passed then let it bury itself.

To quote Wikipedia (the highest form of literary work, no doubt) the origin of the expression is from a prayer of confession of sinfulness. Making a mistake is not sinning. Nor is taking the wrong path.

So, rather than convincing yourself of making a mistake, look at it as an opportunity to perceive or recognize how you can change, AKA discern...which naturally, is latin for "to learn."

No fireplace, but it's getting warm in here

Housewarming.

One doesn't just move into an apartment and write a blog about it without addressing the housewarming process. And I don't mean in the party sense, because if you've ever moved into an apartment you know that the real parties happen long before the official wine and cheese I-no-longer-have-a-bank-account-so-appreciatemyart classy party.

I'm talking about the housewarming gifts. The elusive it's not my birthday or Hanukkah but where are the goods time, when no one is allowed to walk in empty-handed for fear of missing out on next month's (week's) ragefest. So herein lies the issue.

If you're about to head over to your friend's new place, for god sakes put down the orchid. Put down the mezuzah and seriously I probably won't ever open your cheap bottle of white wine unless I'm lonely and it's a night that ends in Y. Okay, the wine can go back in the bag. But do you know what we really want, us 20-somethings who can't afford, like, anything?

A freaking case of water bottles. That's the kind of stuff we can't go to mom and dad for. Think outside the box. What do you think we need most? It's not a scented candle if that was your next guess. Even a picture frame (picture included, come on now) would do. It's functional too, wherever I put it is one less space I have to fill.

Next time when you shop for your friend's new digs, just know that she's probably been eyeing those coasters at Urban and she'll probably love you forever for showing up with them. We drink in our 20s, FYI. Be that friend that's useful. The one that people actually like to have around. You'll thank me later.

Happy Weekending,
Steph

My Happy Dance 2.0

Okay, here it goes. I’ve been poked and prodded, urged and coerced. I’ve been asked, ahem, repeatedly, if I’ll be keeping a written and very public online diary of the trials and tribulations of moving out of my parents’ house. The questions were as follows:

“SO, you’re starting a blog right?” “I’ll get to follow along with you as you venture into the uncharted territory of adulthood?” And my personal favorite, so are you gonna upload all of your furniture to the blog and tell people where to get fabulous finds for cheap? Please…I’m a 23 year old working girl, not Marie Claire.

But, their wish is my commandment, so I’ve decided to start a Blog. And I’ll start you off with a quote:

“Because if you've found meaning in your life, you don't want to go back. You want to go forward. “

Thanks Morrie Schwartz.

I’m not going to preach to you and hold up my metaphorical shining rock and dance around claiming to have found the meaning of life, but there is a profound peacefulness in knowing who you are and not being afraid to act accordingly.

So, as I said: here it goes. Welcome to the life and times of another 23 year old just trying to make her mark.

An Ode to My Parents

"The family is both the fundamental unit of society as well as the root of culture. It ... is a perpetual source of encouragement, advocacy, assurance, and emotional refueling that empowers a child to venture with confidence into the greater world and to become all that he can be."

MARIANNE E. NEIFERT, Dr. Mom's Parenting Guide

“I suppose [my life] has most resembled a blue chip stock: fairly stable, more ups than downs, and gradually trending upward over time. A good buy, a lucky buy, and I've learned that not everyone can say that about his life.”

NICHOLAS SPARKS, The Notebook

      As my college graduation day nears, I’ve started thinking about what has led me to become the person I am today. I could cast it off and attribute my success to hours of studying, pressure to perform or just simply societal mandates that we graduate and join the real world, but that’s not what actually drove me to walk across the stage on May 11.

      Growing up, I saw too many kids fall through the cracks. I knew students just like me who foundered upon moving away and ultimately returned to the comfort and solace of their parents’ homes. Many of whom are still there today.

      So what made me different? As the question manifested itself in my psyche, I could no longer ignore it. The single most reason why I managed to succeed can be boiled down to one word: Stability.

      I’m not saying that the kids whose lives turned out different than mine lacked this consistent stability, but I am wholeheartedly acknowledging what I know was the case for my own life. The stable upbringing my parents provided me not only served as building blocks for success, but they are what drove me to the far ends of the earth without ever forgetting my roots.

      Reflecting on my youth, I think I exemplified a different kind of ADD. I couldn’t sit still, but on a much, much larger scale. I went from private school to public and back in 3 years, only to move on to a different public school 3 years later. Then I started to search for the perfect high school. My parents never batted an eyelash. Caring and nurturing throughout, they urged me to find my best fit.

      Greenhill was the place I knew I would love. For 4 happy years, I thrived as a mature young adult and grew to become the person I am today.

      Sophomore year I was merely a sixteen year old whose summer interests turned sharply from summer camp to a month’s homestay in Spain. I again was met with eagerness and assurance that I would succeed in any endeavor.

      Ultimately, the day came for me to choose a college. Being the adventuresome thrill-seeking girl that I was, it didn’t bother me that I would be going to an out-of-state school, in a city I had never been to, on a campus I had never visited, and to a place where I had no family.

      Apparently- it didn’t bother them either.

      I am simply attempting to put into words the indescribable upbringing with which I was blessed. I was never told that I was too naive, too inexperienced, or too immature to do anything upon which I had set my heart.

      At 21, I traveled all the way to Europe and lived and studied in one of the world’s busiest cities. Along with my belongings, I carried my family’s love, loyalty and support 110% percent of the way.

      So you see, there are ways to bring up a child.

      There will always be limits and boundaries and reasons to say no, but the times they will remember and cherish forever are the times when you let the rules bend a little. It’s okay to quiet the voice in your head that urges you to keep your children around for just a little longer.

      If they feel your support, your love and your stability, then no matter how far you let them go, they will always come back.