My Happy Dance 2.0

Okay, here it goes. I’ve been poked and prodded, urged and coerced. I’ve been asked, ahem, repeatedly, if I’ll be keeping a written and very public online diary of the trials and tribulations of moving out of my parents’ house. The questions were as follows:

“SO, you’re starting a blog right?” “I’ll get to follow along with you as you venture into the uncharted territory of adulthood?” And my personal favorite, so are you gonna upload all of your furniture to the blog and tell people where to get fabulous finds for cheap? Please…I’m a 23 year old working girl, not Marie Claire.

But, their wish is my commandment, so I’ve decided to start a Blog. And I’ll start you off with a quote:

“Because if you've found meaning in your life, you don't want to go back. You want to go forward. “

Thanks Morrie Schwartz.

I’m not going to preach to you and hold up my metaphorical shining rock and dance around claiming to have found the meaning of life, but there is a profound peacefulness in knowing who you are and not being afraid to act accordingly.

So, as I said: here it goes. Welcome to the life and times of another 23 year old just trying to make her mark.

An Ode to My Parents

"The family is both the fundamental unit of society as well as the root of culture. It ... is a perpetual source of encouragement, advocacy, assurance, and emotional refueling that empowers a child to venture with confidence into the greater world and to become all that he can be."

MARIANNE E. NEIFERT, Dr. Mom's Parenting Guide

“I suppose [my life] has most resembled a blue chip stock: fairly stable, more ups than downs, and gradually trending upward over time. A good buy, a lucky buy, and I've learned that not everyone can say that about his life.”

NICHOLAS SPARKS, The Notebook

      As my college graduation day nears, I’ve started thinking about what has led me to become the person I am today. I could cast it off and attribute my success to hours of studying, pressure to perform or just simply societal mandates that we graduate and join the real world, but that’s not what actually drove me to walk across the stage on May 11.

      Growing up, I saw too many kids fall through the cracks. I knew students just like me who foundered upon moving away and ultimately returned to the comfort and solace of their parents’ homes. Many of whom are still there today.

      So what made me different? As the question manifested itself in my psyche, I could no longer ignore it. The single most reason why I managed to succeed can be boiled down to one word: Stability.

      I’m not saying that the kids whose lives turned out different than mine lacked this consistent stability, but I am wholeheartedly acknowledging what I know was the case for my own life. The stable upbringing my parents provided me not only served as building blocks for success, but they are what drove me to the far ends of the earth without ever forgetting my roots.

      Reflecting on my youth, I think I exemplified a different kind of ADD. I couldn’t sit still, but on a much, much larger scale. I went from private school to public and back in 3 years, only to move on to a different public school 3 years later. Then I started to search for the perfect high school. My parents never batted an eyelash. Caring and nurturing throughout, they urged me to find my best fit.

      Greenhill was the place I knew I would love. For 4 happy years, I thrived as a mature young adult and grew to become the person I am today.

      Sophomore year I was merely a sixteen year old whose summer interests turned sharply from summer camp to a month’s homestay in Spain. I again was met with eagerness and assurance that I would succeed in any endeavor.

      Ultimately, the day came for me to choose a college. Being the adventuresome thrill-seeking girl that I was, it didn’t bother me that I would be going to an out-of-state school, in a city I had never been to, on a campus I had never visited, and to a place where I had no family.

      Apparently- it didn’t bother them either.

      I am simply attempting to put into words the indescribable upbringing with which I was blessed. I was never told that I was too naive, too inexperienced, or too immature to do anything upon which I had set my heart.

      At 21, I traveled all the way to Europe and lived and studied in one of the world’s busiest cities. Along with my belongings, I carried my family’s love, loyalty and support 110% percent of the way.

      So you see, there are ways to bring up a child.

      There will always be limits and boundaries and reasons to say no, but the times they will remember and cherish forever are the times when you let the rules bend a little. It’s okay to quiet the voice in your head that urges you to keep your children around for just a little longer.

      If they feel your support, your love and your stability, then no matter how far you let them go, they will always come back.

The Tweet of the Day

      There’s a saying, “if you can’t change the people around you, then change the people around you.” I’ll give you a second or two to let that sink in. – We good? Okay.

      Well I read that the other day on, of course, Twitter, (#dontknockittillyatryit) and it just kind of stuck. I’m a big believer that we have control of our own destinies.

      As my time at college draws to a close (7 weeks, but who’s counting right?) I’ve started to become incredibly reflective on my time in the great state of Georgia. I’ve made friends that will last a lifetime and our memories will hardly be forgotten. But, I would be lying if I didn’t admit I’m excited for a change.

      College is great, but man I am so ready to get back into city life. Coming here I have learned so much about myself. I’m ready for the opportunities a post-grad life will bring, and somehow no matter how far away I am, my appreciation for Texas has remained about as big as the state itself.

      I surely didn’t want to change the people around me these past 4 years, but now that my thoughts have shifted I’m glad to have that chance.

A New Kind of Sleep Cycle

      I’ll warn you. This post isn’t gonna be pretty – but like many of my others – it’s still I something I believe needs to be said.

     I had one of those nights last night, the ones where you wake up in the middle of the night and check the clock, hoping it’s only a few minutes to your alarm, but in the back of your mind you know it’s far, far too dark outside.

     6:35 a.m. Great. I had two choices. I could sit there and spend my idle time forcing myself back to sleep (we both know that wouldn’t go well), or I could use my wired state to think about the day ahead. Well, the day became the month, the month became the year. I was literally sitting in a dark room thinking, no, worrying about the coming months. Ugh… nothing good would come of this.

     So that’s when the idea for this post started to form in the corners of my mind. Here I was obsessing about something for which I had absolutely zero control. I was being too hard on myself, critical that I had taken a golden opportunity to plan (or really even sleep) and turned it into a pity party. And not the good kind. I’m talking the kind of party where you’re the guest with no certain future and no real job offer. Yet everyone somehow wants to know what YOU’RE doing after graduation.

     We all do that, you know. When our minds are too idle we’re prone to worry; we aim to control the uncontrollable. Like, if somehow we think about it enough the events will fall naturally into place like pieces of a puzzle.

     I challenge you to retrain your mind. I’m certainly going to try. I challenge you to dwell on the positive. Use those elusive early hours of the morning to get excited about the good things in your life.

     It took me a full 45 min for the fact that it’s a Friday to even cross my mind. I have one class today and the weekend will make itself known before 2pm. Yet here I was thinking about how I would probably have to work in July. Don’t say you haven’t been there.

     Everyone wants a challenge. Game on.